Outkast

So I thought the world loved Outkast as much as I did, but I ended up buying most of their CD's dirt cheap on Amazon. Whatev, one man's trash is another's new work out CD.


Outkast - I Like The Way You Move

Math Saved My Soul

My senior AP English teacher required we all get a subscription to the Atlantic Monthly. Eight years later and I am still forever in her debt. From there I began to read more of the New Yorker and when I moved to NYC a year later my appetite for such magazines and other journals had grown.

With my impending month off I am looking forward to so much, catching up on many of those rags is one of them. Eight years ago today, tragedy struck. I was in gym class when news of the towers being hit reached our high school. The gymnasium was a new annex to the school, separated by the cafeteria, and the theater. The news hit my ears in bits and pieces as I made my way through the halls to my civics class. People were in such shock, they couldn't get full sentences out. I heard "bombs," "New York," "Pentagon," "planes," "Twin towers." Then panic began to set in, "terrorists," "White House," "Boston," "GE" (which sent my head spinning, my father worked there). I didn't get any clear answers until I made it to my class, sat in my seat and turned around to my ex-boyfriend, who I sparingly spoke to due to the fact he was still a little sore about the way things had gone down between us,
"Sh---" was all I got out of my mouth, before Shawn said, "Two planes just crashed into the World Trade Center towers. They think a similar thing happened at the Pentagon. It's most likely a terrorist attack, but no other attacks have been reported." We watched the classroom t.v. sets like drones for the rest of the day . . . except in my math class.

Mrs. Latham was part expert math teacher/comedienne. Next to Mrs. Robinson she's another reason why math never kicked my butt. She looked at us and said,

"We could sit here and watch the same horror over and over again. But I don't know much about world politics save a few personal opinions of my own. What I do know is education, particularly education in math. I came here today prepared to teach you the tools you'll need to pass your AP Calculus exam in the spring and continue on with your bright futures. I will not let whatever force is out there stop me from teaching you, stop me from doing something that I love. You honor the dead by helping the living." We spent the rest of class solving for "y." There are some "why's" we may never solve for . . . but she taught me that we can shrivel up and cower in the corner or we can do whatever it is we do best in hopes to ameliorate. Accept your part of the struggle, one hand and one step at a time.

I had a hard time watching the news coverage myself. But this article surfaced weeks following the attack and struck a much needed chord in me, The Talk of the Town (09/24/01).

I'll never achieve Nirvana

In order to achieve Nirvana you have to successfully meditate. I had a religious studies teacher who made us meditate before he started each class. I could never empty my mind because these things are ALWAYS in there:

1. Steven Wright's joke: "For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier . . . I put them in the same room and let them fight it out."

2. "Don't Whiz on the Electric Fence" You can let it rain in the break down lane . . .

3. Al Bundy



4. "It was all a dream/I used to read Word Up magazine"



5. My best friend Nelly going to see Tupac:Resurrection in the movie theaters . . . by herself . . . 3 times.



LOVE HER FOREVER!!!

Love (in perspective)

I remember the first time I held you in my arms. I hated holding newborn babies, but you were different. Even though you were just a few weeks old you squirmed and wriggled . . . so animated. I don't care what anyone says, all babies are ugly-cute. And you were no exception (though emphasis on the CUTE in ugly-cute, okay). I never knew what it felt like to love someone, a total stranger, so much. To know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I would do anything for you. Forget just material things, I would sell parts of my soul, lose my dignity, live the rest of my days in agony, go to hell and back for eternity, just so you could have one more second on Earth. I would face the black abyss without hesitation. I jokingly tell you I love you more than pumpkin spice mousse, floppy-eared puppies, meteor showers, chocolate-covered pretzels, bear hugs, full moons, monarch butterflies, lilac trees, red and orange leaves, Cumulonimbus clouds, thunderstorms, breaking waves, spring breezes and hot, humid nights. But closer to the truth would be, I'd give up the experience of all those things and more, just so you could have them. And the kicker: you wouldn't even have to like them, as long as they inspired you to go out and find the things that make you happy, that make you whole. You're not even my son, but I cannot imagine loving anyone more and even if I never have my own children, just being able to love you makes me feel like I am not at a loss in that department. My heart goes out to the people who do not know that kind of love and if I could leave you with any one gift, it would be the one you've given me . . . perspective.

Come on home

True Blood earned points from me during its episode Frenzy for throwing in Screamin' Jay Hawkins.



A lot of points. I love this crazy man.


You've just got to come home yourself.

Rambling II

My first grade teacher Miss Bolden taught me about "sins."

She described them as marks on our souls, that even if no one else knew about them, even if we ourselves forgot about them, on the day we died God would be able to see these marks.

I imagined something like a papyrus scroll inside my chest. I had nightmares about God pulling it out at the Pearly White gates and shaking his head.

I imagined them hurting as they were etched onto that scroll, as if the scroll were a living part of me.

Then she started listing what the church considered sins and as I got older I learned about even more.

I don't know if there's any truth to this. But I do know that I've felt pain in my soul before and I wonder what my scroll looks like nowadays.

Little People and Short Films

What brings us together and what keeps us apart

fame





I'm am so excited for 9. Fingers crossed for a midnight showing.

Here are Shane Acker's short films. Enjoy!

The Astounding Talents of Mr. Grenade

The Hangnail

9 (original short film)

Summer's Over

before it really ever begun.

I smelled autumn for the first time today. I can't wait to hop in the shower with my array of Pumpkin smelling products. However there are a few summer questions I'd like to pose to the blog world while the last few moments of summer slip away:

1. Why did gladiator style sandals make me look like an actual gladiator, marching off to the Colosseum to fight a lion or a bear or Russell Crowe? Other girls could rock 'em, but my man-calves just made them look God-awful on me.

2. Where was all the humidity? I'm moving South after Illinois. Fuck this shit.

3. I thought there was a recession but with the way people shopped at the Marsh this summer, you'd never know. Why did people feel a need to buy 10 pair of gladiator-style sandals? Do they know something I don't? Could Zombies be an actual threat? (Sorry that last one is always a lingering question in my mind.)

4. Why do Hot Fudge Sundae Pop Tarts taste like cake batter? They should be called Cake Batter Pop Tarts . . . stop lying to us (and they should be given out for free, they might achieve world peace).

5. Why were kids so darn cute this summer, much more than usual? Latest cute kid alert, some kid asked his dad in layaway if Rey was President Obama. I laughed so hard my sides ached.

6. Why does the big burger cheese cost less then the little burger cheese at 5 Guys? I'm with Fletcher on this, I say we strike til we get some answers!

7. Why did you kill everyone off this summer?

8. Why is Stephen so great?

Today he was asking if I had a "boy" in Illinois and I said, yep. His name is Jordan and he just turned 3 last month. Then he asked me the "dreaded" question . . . "So are you seeing anyone?"

So in the most compact, concise way I explained: I'm best friends with my ex, I can't stand most men and their attitudes towards me, I had a year long crush on someone 3000 miles away, the 3000 miles away part being my favorite part about him. A very nice soon-to-be lawyer has a crush on me, but he calls me baby and has already told me what I should be doing with my life. I've dated someone I've met at a bar . . . never again. I've gone out with a guy who used to sing to me in the first grade who found me through facebook, he was more after the "story." I agree, it would have been a lovely story to tell our grand-kids. Alas. And then . . .

Stephen: And then . . . ?

Me: And then there's the one who has the most in common with Jordan, only I think he definitely has more toys. I thought I liked him, and I thought he liked me, I mean he let me play with his Ewok . .

sidenote: I know what Alison Wonderland is thinking . . . but no this was more like the "banana is so long and hard" comment, made more to myself than for laugh factor. Which probably makes it funnier but wait . . . numero uno reason why I love Stephen.

Stephen (without skipping a beat): Oh girl, boys will always let you play with their Ewoks.

(cue laugh track)

My dating life is one big shitty joke. And I'm oddly okay with that.

Summer '09, save the people dropping like flies thing, you were alright. No real complaints. Stay fly.

Take it away, Beth.