Napkin Notes: 5/17/09

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Ahh! Post Secret, I Love You.

Here are my top three picks from the Post Secret Blog.

♥ ♥ ♥

Show love. Get info on how to pre-order the new book here.

Sunshowers please, fingers crossed

My Philosophy of Life, John Ashbery

My favorite line, "Still, there's a lot of fun to be had in the gaps between ideas."

Her Kind, Anne Sexton

Landscape With The Fall of Icarus, William Carlos Williams

Must be something in the water there . . .

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond, e e cummings

Friday, May 22, 2009

10. smelling like a boy
9. old-fashioned clawfoot styled bathtubs
8. getting my hair messed up
7. finding notes in the margins of used books
6. cursive
5. wearing the wrong* day-of-the-week socks (and being the only one who knows)
4. humidity
3. hanging my hand out of the window of a car and letting the wind hold it in place
2. freezer pops, specifically the ones in plastic as opposed to the ones on sticks
1. hearing the first sound of the commuter train coming

*or wearing a combination of days, e.g. Monday on the left, Friday on the right

Sometimes you don't have to agree to understand.

A friend and I were talking about the nature of friendship late into the evening the other night. Principle XXVII of Epicurean Philosophy (a philosophy likened to hedonism) even sights friendship as an integral part of achieving "happiness." Look, waaaaay back in PHIL 101 I learned to STOP trying to reconcile any particular philosophy's views and my own. The Principle of Charity states that in order to criticize, one must fully understand a view first. I think the same principle should be applied to people. I criticized a friend in an 8 page research paper a few years back about his reasons for not voting AFTER I had got to know him. For example, I knew his apathy towards the ballot wasn't masking some horrible election day tragedy, no loved one had died in a chad related accident . . . etc. In short, I knew we were cool.

The first step is always understanding. A friend from work is deeply and madly in love with James Taylor, she goes as far to say he's her biggest celebrity crush. Hey I like good folky music and all but . . . well I won't judge. So without further adieu here are some tunes dedicated to friends.

Best point made, sometimes being able to be there for a friend is something that helps keep us strong.

Keep on keeping on loves,
xoxo,
Cindy Mayweather

Thursday, May 21, 2009

So Kids are the Coolest

And the fact that I relate to them more than adults sometimes scares me.

A few weeks ago it was crazy at work and the line was long and full of people (they shopped in packs or something). I was ringing one family through and I say this mop-topped little brunette stomping her way through the crowd. Now for a person of her petite stature this was quite easy. Her adult-sized grandmother found it a little more difficult to maneuver through the people and just started yelling, "Emily, come back her. Don't make Nonnie come get you. Stop right there, turn around and come back."
Emily didn't even look back, she just kept marching, folded her arms and uttered the greatest phrase I think any little 3-4 year old could ever say, "I quit!"
My mind immediately began to try to compile a list of possible things a 3-4 year old could quit from doing. And then I realized that it didn't matter, because sometimes when the world is chasing after you making demands and all you want to do is get away that's just exactly how you feel. You just want to quit. Nonnie did catch up to little Emily, and Emily kicked and screamed the entire way out of the store. Her grandmother and mother kept saying she just hadn't had her nap yet. Again, I can completely relate.

Then came Sunday. I wasn't supposed to work Sunday but then I did and it was a mistake to have done so, except for Cody. I am very glad I met Cody. Cody has come in the store before with his lightsaber. Look, people, kids especially, want to tell you about stuff that makes them happy. I love hearing about stuff that makes people happy, and lots of times, I learn a ton of cool shit. I know what a lightsaber is . . . but asking Cody, "Hey is that one of those thing-a-ma-bob's you put ice cream in?" and giving him the chance to giggle and to tell me all about what he actually sees it as, there isn't a right or wrong answer, hell he could have made up an entirely different function for it or gone along with my idea of putting ice cream on top of it, that makes me happy. As long as he believed it and it made him happy, I'd be down for anything. He told me he usually let his mom be Princess Leia, but if I wanted to be her, I could. His mother said she had only let him watch the first movie so far (excuse me "A New Hope") and was making him wait at least a few months in between movies. That was back in the fall because Cody had been Luke for Halloween, hence the actual purchase of the lightsaber. So Sunday he came in the store and I had the pleasure of ringing him and his mom through. Cody had his lightsaber (as always) but I noticed he had a little extra pep in his step as he waltzed over to my register with his mom.

"He made us wait in line until we got you because he wanted to give you something and tell you something." First Cody handed me a number 5 fitting room tag (way to drop the ball fitting room associate, a five-year-old grifted you), and he did so with so much pride.

His mom goes, "I didn't even know he still had it and he wouldn't let me give it to anyone else but you."

"Thanks for keeping it safe man, what was it you wanted to tell me?"

Cody just looked down at the lightsaber and then looked at his mom, and then looked at his lightsaber.

"Well go ahead and tell her."

Then Cody gets real close to the register counter, plants his little chin on top of it, puts the lightsaber down and cups his mouth with both hands. I lean in and Cody whispers, "Did you know that Darth Vader is Luke's father?" I couldn't stop the uncontrollable smiling because . . . well . . . that's the best. Then as he grabs his lightsaber he says more to himself than to anyone, "I didn't see that coming." I know exactly what it feels like to want to share something of that magnitude. Cody, you made my day. Keep it real, little man.

Dream hard, play fair, and be honest,
sincerely
xoxo
Cindy Mayweather

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

This used to be my playground

I used to cry to you blog world and I suppose sometimes I still will. Then I came to a realization . . .

Lately I've been realizing how amazing the people in my life are. When you need them the most, they come through. About a month ago some guy I had been seeing came into the store where I work. My initial reaction--- run, hide. Which is exactly what I did . . . at first. I flew to the stock room called my friend and met her in her office. The last note he and I had ended on had been, er, awkward. I was almost hyperventilating so her and this other coworker were trying to calm me down. One kept telling me she understood how awkward it all was and suggested I take my lunch early (of course this meant I had to go pick up evil manager's lunch . . . but that's another story entirely). "But what if I run into him" was all I kept mumbling and by this time three lovely women were helping me with my dilemma. The thing that actually calmed me down (and I've been meaning to thank this girl for a while now) were these words, "Girl, don't let a 'man' come into your place of business and upset you like this. He's own your turf now. We're your friends, we're your coworkers. What do you want? Either way we'll all have your back." Oddly inspiring, so I teetered for a minute about wanting to ask him out again or completely ignoring him. "Well I at least want to talk to him again." So we devised a plan. I still had to go get mean manager's lunch, so one of them would walk out with me and cover me. The other two would go out and keep an eye on him while I was gone and keep me updated via text message. I also text messaged him from the road letting him know I was aware of his presence there so if he wanted to run, he could. When I got back I brought "the lunch" to "the beast" and then I walked to where he was. They were going to give me about 5 minutes to talk with him and then one of them was going to come up and call me away, giving me an excuse to leave if I needed it. Things kept getting better for me, people I knew and love were coming in to the store saying "Hi" to me giving me tons of confidence. I think the best had to be "little man," a co-worker's grandson. I had already shrugged off my "excuse to leave" and after seeing that face smile at me I knew that no matter what this cat said to me if I asked him out again I would be okay. These people would still be here for me and all they wanted was for me to be happy. I already felt like I had won.

I kind of let a lot of things build up these past few weeks and they caught up with me at work yesterday and today. Yesterday I pulled myself together, today . . . not so much. But both times the emotional support I got from the people in my life made things better and made tomorrow look brighter. About an hour ago, I was looking at things all wrong; I was going to make amends with my snooze button and all that. Not anymore. I'm happy. And that's no lie.

On a related note, I finally had a civil conversation with my mother about moving out. A few months ago I cruelly suggested to her that I was hoping to attend graduate school in Colorado and she flipped her shit. As she berated me for a good . . . 20 minutes I kept thinking, worst idea in the world. My plan all along had been to suggest Colorado so that when I suggest moving like across town she would think well, at least it's not Colorado. Life with her after that was, tense (yes "tense" would be a good way to describe it). Silly woman for believing me. Everyone who knows me knows I could never live far from the ocean.

I hear it's supposed to be a hot one tomorrow . . .

Time to bust out with the bathing suits and sandals!!!

This shit is crazy. Love it though. Those little buggers are adorable.

Add one more thing on list of must-do's with the girls during our roommate reunion (two years is too long, too long) in NYC.

Now this is a door I'd love everyone to walk through (and yes chalkboard paint it the best . . . in the world). And on that note, everyone check out rockstar diaries, I love Naomi's lists of things that make people happy . . . lists that don't stress me out. ♥

And this "cat" has the right idea for the summer . . . deal with it FU Penguin, deal. He's just a little cooler AND cuter than you.

Their shows made me so happy when I was little. I bet they still would.

Poetry Corner

Annabel Lee
by Edgar Allan Poe

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of ANNABEL LEE;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love-
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me-
Yes!- that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
Of many far wiser than we-
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.

For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.